God Is A Security Camera

This year my daughter and I ventured out on "Black Friday" for the first time. I was thrilled to buy the last special deal at Target--a Tom Tom GPS at over $100 off. I bought it for Chuck, so excited to have a huge surprise for him and at a DEAL! A week later, Chuck bought one online at an even better deal so I was forced to return my gift (still smirking that it must have been a great idea if both of us bought one!) I had 4 returns total to make at Target. The next day, I looked at the receipt from the return and realized the Tom Tom was not on the receipt, therefore I had no refund. I wasn't sure what to do...I began shaming myself for not looking at the receipt right away thinking there was no way the store would believe me without concrete evidence and the passage of time...I thought I would just have to eat the cost. It seemed only I REALLY knew the truth. I felt stuck. Surely the lady doing the return would remember my story and vouch for me---this gave me courage to at least call the manager although I didn't know how or why he would even believe me. His answer was simple...bring in my receipt and they will call up the film from the security camera from that time...if what they see on the tape matches my story, they will give me my money back. I always thought security cameras were to protect stores from profit loss, but I see now that its a two way street, they also protect customers from mistakes on the store's end also!! So today, I'm off to see a film with me as the main character in hopes of getting an oscar--my $80 back!

This is significant to my heart. Through having to make a very hard ministry decision recently in which only I knew the complete details and had to seek God for direction, I was a bit ashamed or awkward at having the truth but not sure how, or more IF, I could vocalize all of it due to it involving multiple people, mulitple factors. I found myself circling with all the facts and sin lurking at every corner---anger, bitterness, sorrow which led to doubt, etc...I just couldn't break free even though God had clearly spoken about the earlier decision and I was confident of that. I realized there must be something more than this situation, probably a place of bondage since I couldn't let it go and kept replaying what I wish people knew, trying to defend myself in my mind. I, in fact, had myself "on trial". As I invited Jesus to speak to this place in my heart, He reminded me of several memories from high school that were similar, where I knew the truth but had no way to defend myself publicly or make the truth known which put me in very awkward positions or even caused others to question/malign my character--this ultimately produced a layer of shame on my heart which also led to lack of confidence. He is healing these circumstances and memories with His presence by showing me the damage to my heart at that time since I didn't come to Him with it. Resting in Him knowing the truth is setting me free as what was once hidden is now in the open with my Savior. He's reminding me "You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free. " John 8:32 and "Those who look to Him are radiant, their faces are never covered with shame." Psalm 34:5

By getting my eyes on Jesus with these situations I am being set free from shame, and I recognize a new strength birthing in my heart...its called courage. Courage to speak up, to defend my heart (and my pocket book with Target) and to keep my eyes on Jesus to remain radiant and not hiding in shame because He is a camera with a lens into my heart.

Since He is our security camera---may His tender eyes that are on us ALL the time gives us security. He knows us best and delights in shooting new film as we live life together with Him, but He is also desiring to hit replay on the dark places of the story to shed light that brings healing, restoration and freedom.